As a blogger I am really aware of having our whole lives online. I always have our family security at the back of my mind, not wanting to give away too much. I have always seen this blog, foremost, as a place to record memories and milestones, to really document the children growing up. But, unlike a photo album, or reminiscing with relatives this blog is out there for the world to see, for everyone to read and have an opinion on for years to come.
And with that comes such great responsibility. I am creating a huge digital imprint of literally the whole of LP and Little Man’s childhood. I have documented the best of days, the absolute worst of days and the milestones as they have arrived but in doing so I have been mindful that one day they may read the thousands of posts that I have created – that their friends may read them, family may read them and other people that we see at the school gates may read them too. Literally anyone in the children’s lives could find themselves on this blog, reading about the children, the things I have written about them and the good and bad times that I have documented.
I know that most of the things I write about are things the children will have memories of anyway – days out and holidays or they are things that we will talk about – their first teeth, their first steps and that first pair of shoes.
But when you are writing in the moment, when the emotion is so raw it is easy to write things that you wouldn’t ever expect to say to the children. I remember writing how hard it was having two children when Little Man was a few months old. I was exhausted, breastfeeding and constant nappy changes were relentless and being a Mum was so all-consuming that I had to get it out of my system. I was finding it tough.
But that is the sort of thing I will tell the children as they get older – having them both so close together was so hard but so, so worth it – something I have said so many times before. I am so glad we went through those tough months to get to where we are now, with two children who are just so close and who adore each other.
Everything I write I know I don’t mind other people reading – people in the present or anyone reading it in the future, including the children. I would never write anything that might embarrass the children or anything that they might feel bad about later on. I know that as the children get older they may not feature as much on the blog as they need their own privacy and they need to be able to live their lives without me documenting it – those milestones will get less but I will still use this blog the way I had intended – to document our lives – and so their appearances in later years may dwindle to days out and holidays, like any family photo album.
But, for now, the children do appear on this blog almost every day. I also talk about life, our family dynamic and my feelings all the time but I am always aware of not sharing too much and I think, as a blogger, it could be easy to write whatever is in your head without thinking of that digital imprint we are leaving for anyone to read as the years go by.
I think whenever we write something, as much as we have freedom of speech, we need to think if anyone else would be hurt by it, whether anyone else would be effected by it and really whether it is down to us to be writing it – or is it someone else’s story to tell.
I want our children to look back on this blog and be proud. Proud that they have their whole childhood to look back on, proud that I have shown them at their best – and at their worst – but always in the best light and that, although I have made this blog into my business I haven’t sold out the children to do so. I hope they are proud of this space and that they appreciate this digital imprint – for the memories it has kept safe – rather than being embarrassed by it.