I am More than That
I was speaking to my friend Mel recently and I commented on how much I loved her french accent. I do, it’s so lovely to listen to and when I read her blog I have her voice in my head. It’s beautiful. But she said how she hates being labelled ‘french’ – how she’s isn’t ‘french Mel’ – she’s Mel, who happens to be french. But being french doesn’t define her, it’s just part of who she is.
I am the same with being ginger. It’s a huge part of who I am. It’s something I have had a love/hate relationship with over the years and now, in my thirties, it is something I really love about myself. It’s a big part of my identity – as you can tell by the name on this blog, and it’s something I’m so glad to have passed down to LP too.
But, being ginger isn’t all that I am. I’m, at times, referred to as ‘the ginger one’ and every time it grates on me. You see, being ginger is so much a part of me but it isn’t all that I am. I am more than the colour of my hair.
I’m 32 years old and, unsurprisingly, I have been ginger all of my life. In that time I have – in no specific order – gone through school, dropped out of college a handful of times and climbed the ranks in my old HSBC career, I tried internet dating, met a man, got married, had two beautiful kids and bought a house – then another. I got cats, learnt to cook, had an extension built and started a blog.
I have made friends, travelled, taught myself the basics of photography and captured so many memories both at home and away. I have come to terms with vlogging, learnt about blogging, social media and the basics of internet marketing. I have read books, started to write one and have spent time helping other people in every aspect of my life.
I have gone from being a homeless teenager to being a self employed mum of two with a great husband and a lovely home. I have worked hard, given as much back as I could and I have taught my children to be the best that they can be – whilst always being nice.
And that’s about it, for now. I’m me and there are so many different parts to that, one of which is the colour of my hair. But, it doesn’t define me. My name’s Donna, yes, I’m ginger – but I’m also so much more than that.
Yes. That! I hate it when people label you as one thing, ‘French Mel’ or ‘Ginger Donna.’ Yes, it is a way to describe us (too obvious to run away from gingerness or Frenchness!), but it’s not what defines us. I am Mel. I am French. I am so much more too! Love you, my sweet, clever, talented friend. xxxx
I can really identify with this as it’s something that worries me and sort of stops me from doing things, like I don’t want to be known as the person who has a chronic condition so I don’t talk about it, or the woman with Hyperemesis so I rarely talk about it. I think it’s so important to know people are a whole and not defined by one thing, mostly which they can’t even control xx
I’m the short one, and often get labelled ‘shorty Sherry’ or the little one. It’s hard sometimes because you want to be recognised for you x
I would love to have ginger hair but I don’t define people or even remember them in that way really! When I think of Mel, yes I could listen to her talk ALL day but I think about how much her mothering instincts and love for her kids shine through when she’s talking and how I wish I could take photos the way she does. When I think of you, I think of a helpful soul, a fountain of knowledge, a friend and somebody I admire! You are definitely so much more than your (awesome) hair! x
It’s so weird isn’t it? I definitely don’t think of your hair colour when I think of you — I think of all the times you’ve helped me (or fellow bloggers) and same with Mel. She’s definitely more than her accent (although I could listen to her voice all day long too!!) 🙂 xx
I love how you’ve embraced being a redhead and are an advocate for it when so many other people seem to have a downer on red hair. I love it! Your daughter will also continue to love it throughout her life because of how you are. And why not? It also irks me why people comment on ginger hair as though it’s something unusual or weird. It’s not unique, loads of people have ginger hair! Anyway, back to the point – look how much you’ve achieved in the years you’ve been alive! Incredible.
I’m an American living in the UK (after 2 years of living in Japan). Every time I meet someone new, the conversation always veers towards me being an American (like where are you from and how long have you been here). Sometimes it feels a bit like having an American accent will always set me apart from everyone else. It would be nice to be noticed for something else when interacting with people for the first time.