How Childhood Trauma Affects Adulthood: From Relationships to Health

*This is a collaborative guest post

Childhood trauma remains as we grow older. You are a product of your environment. How you think and feel, all of it stems from your early experiences, stems from childhood, and stretches into adulthood.

Psychologists use the term Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) to describe early exposure to abuse, neglect, and any negative experience in childhood. The more ACEs, the higher the likelihood of facing challenges in relationships, work, and self-esteem. These lifelong effects are discussed in this article. By getting to know them, you make a first step toward building healthier, more fulfilling lives.

What Does It Mean to Have Childhood Trauma?

Childhood trauma refers to deeply distressing or disturbing experiences that occur before the age of 18. These may include physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, neglect, or exposure to household dysfunction such as substance misuse, mental illness, or domestic violence.

A large study of 500,000 participants from 22 countries showed that 22% had at least one ACE, and 38% had 2+ ACEs [1]. If you don’t have access to professional help or don’t feel secure enough, take a childhood trauma test for adults to determine which and how many ACEs you likely had. However, it’s important to account for sociodemographic and economic factors because certain ages, nationalities, races, and health states are more prone to experiencing stress in early childhood.

What does it feel like to experience the effects of childhood trauma in adulthood? If you find yourself in many or most signs, you may want to explore childhood trauma in more detail.

• A constant sense of hypervigilance, always expecting something bad to happen.
• Feeling emotionally numb at times, disconnected from joy and excitement.
• Difficulty trusting others, paired with a debatable fear of being abandoned.
• Experiencing shame or guilt without a clear reason.
• Self-criticism and comparing yourself harshly to others.
• Recurrent flashbacks.
• Strong emotional reactions (anger, fear, sadness) that feel disproportionate.

How Does Childhood Trauma Affect Adulthood?

Research shows that ACEs have a lasting impact on relationships, health, career success, and overall self-worth. Below, we’ll explore five major areas where trauma leaves its footprint.

How Does Childhood Trauma Affect Relationships in Adulthood

One of the clearest impacts of childhood trauma is visible in how people relate to others. According to John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth’s attachment theory, early experiences with caregivers shape attachment style. Breeze Mental Health offers valuable resources for exploring your attachment style and how to change it toward healthier patterns.

Attachment style is like an instruction for our mind on building emotional bonds with others and forming trust and intimacy. Here are the signs of childhood trauma affecting relationships in adulthood:

• Difficulty trusting others

Adults who experienced neglect or abuse in childhood often find it hard to rely on people. Even when others show care, they may assume hidden motives or fear eventual abandonment. This happens because there were only negative examples of being used and never helped.

• Emotional withdrawal

Shutting down emotionally is a common way in which childhood trauma affects adult relationships. According to the study from Frontiers in Psychiatry, becoming emotionally unavailable makes a person appear “stronger” and not vulnerable [2]. This protective mechanism develops as a reaction to being hurt or taken advantage of.

• Not communicating needs

If, as children, our needs were dismissed, ignored, or punished, we may learn not to express what we truly feel. A foundation of every relationships is clear communications, including discussing something hurtful or unpleasent. If needs are not discussed, this leads to strained relationships.

• Repetition of unhealthy dynamics (revictimization)

People with trauma histories may unconsciously gravitate toward controlling, neglectful, or abusive partners because the dynamics of enmeshed family systems feel familiar. They may not intentionally do this, it’s just something they do because it makes them feel more confident or something that is ingrained deeply into the subconscious.

• Fear of abandonment

Even in stable relationships, this feeling triggers clinginess, jealousy, overdependence, or unhealthy communication, which prevents feeling secure and happy in friendly or romantic relationships.

• Hypervigilance and conflict sensitivity

Small disagreements can feel like major threats. This stems from growing up in unpredictable environments where minor issues escalated quickly.

Effects on Physical Health

The body remembers what the mind tries to forget. Studies, especially the CDC–Kaiser Permanente ACE Study, revealed that individuals with four or more ACEs have a significantly higher risk of chronic illnesses such as heart disease, cancer, and autoimmune conditions [3].

The mechanism lies in toxic stress. When children live under constant threat, their bodies release high levels of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. Over time, this dysregulates the immune system and creates chronic inflammation. Even decades later, trauma survivors may struggle with high blood pressure, digestive issues, or autoimmune flare-ups.

Childhood Trauma And Cognitive Abilities

Childhood trauma also affects adulthood in the way the brain develops. The hippocampus, a region critical for memory and learning, can shrink under prolonged stress [4]. Excess stress hormones interfere with concentration and the ability to retain new information.

In adulthood, this may look like difficulty focusing at work, forgetting important details, or struggling with decision-making. School struggles or frequent job changes are common outcomes when trauma undermines cognitive capacity.

How Does Childhood Trauma Affect Earning Money

Financial stability often suffers when early trauma is part of someone’s story. Research shows that adults with multiple ACEs are more likely to face unemployment, lower educational attainment, and job instability. Cognitive difficulties and impaired executive function (like poor concentration) and emotional struggles (such as fear of failure or rejection) play an even more significant role.

In real life, this can mean hesitating to apply for promotions or leaving jobs due to interpersonal conflicts. Trauma survivors may develop self-limiting beliefs such as “I’m not good enough,” which hold them back in their careers. In the long run, these patterns translate into reduced economic insecurity.

Reduced Self-Worth After Surviving Childhood Trauma

At the core of many long-term effects is a fragile sense of self. Adults with childhood trauma might carry persistent shame and feelings of unworthiness. They may overprioritize others’ needs while neglecting their own, and accept poor treatment in relationships. Related to the previous point, they sabotage opportunities that could improve their lives.

This diminished self-worth sometimes drives people toward substance use or unhealthy coping strategies. Social positioning may also suffer, as trauma survivors hesitate to take up space or pursue fulfilling careers. The internalized message is often, “I don’t deserve better.”

Addressing Effects of Childhood Trauma in Adulthood

Healing and change from the effects of childhood trauma on adulthood are absolutely possible. It’s difficult, but adults can change their emotional responses and build fulfilling lives even after difficult beginnings.

• Awareness. The first step is acknowledging the influence of trauma. Use reflective tools, such as online quizzes or journaling, to reveal something new. Journaling shouldn’t be “exciting” or bring up unexpected things about you. It’s how you recall and remember important things about yourself when reactions are driven by past wounds rather than the present situation.
• Therapy. Professional help is key. Evidence-based therapies like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), and trauma-focused approaches have proven effective in reducing PTSD symptoms and improving daily functioning.
• Reparenting. Healing involves nurturing yourself in ways you might have missed as a child. Take your photo from the childhood and talk to yourself as if it was another child. What does this child want? What were their dreams? Who let them down? It helps with negative self-talk as it helps to realize that we are just vulnerable kids who once were hurt.